Top 5 Ideal Video Game Girlfriends [ VIDEO ]

People like Melvin are definitely what is wrong with the gaming culture. There are plenty of ideal girlfriends inside your own country, there’s no reason to look outside of it. Seriously.

source: YouTube


  • Scarlet Pirate

    Do I need to watch it, or is the overly sexualized Samus Aran with special attentions to her titties enough to tell me how this will play out? (Yes, I know Samus wears a skin tight suit. No, I’ve never seen them sag like cow udders before.)

    • Battle Catman

      Yep, it’s pretty much what you’d expect.

      My “ideal” video game girlfriend? Chun-Li. Serious when she needs to be but cheerful and playful when she wins an argument, dedicated to her job, intelligent, good with kids, and with a strong sense of right and wrong.

      • Scarlet Pirate

        Okay, I’ve gone home and watched it. It’s not as bad as I thought but his other posts look like the same thing. I’ll turn down my rage.

  • thewood

    Female Commander Shepherd. Spectre who can do whatever she wants, becomes the ultimate badass of the galaxy, getting insanely rich in the process, then dies for the good of the galaxy, leaving her fortune to her loving boyfriend. PERFECT!

  • PrinceJonathan

    #5 Kerrigan. Only know her from a short comic called Nova, Mistress of Blades. It’s hot, but NSFW.

    #4 Peach. Meh…wait Forbes says she’s divorced?! 2:47 “Heiress to the Mushroom Kingdom nearly doubled personal net worth after terms of divorce from hero plumber Mario…” When the **** did that happen? I didn’t know they were ever married!?

    #3 Samus. No…just no. Way too many psychological PTSD-ish problems with that one. Come on you just don’t go on encountering the same space pirate dragon thing that murdered your parents over and over AND NOT have a few screws loose!

    And I don’t care much for 1 & 2.

    Personally I’d rather sleep with Melvin. I bet his bedroom is full of cool nerd stuff!

    • tustin2121

      I’d probably say the same for Laura Croft (#1): she’s got some issues there. Granted, I’m working from Yahtzee’s analysis of her, but I’m sure it isn’t that far off…

  • Ed

    Is this douchenozzle’s lisp real, or is he one of those knuckleheads who thinks he needs to talk that way for more “geek cred”? Hell, I know fighter pilots who probably spend more time playing shooters, flight sims, and any game with a leader-board than any reasonable human being should. This stereotypical crap is annoying as all hell.

    Oh and that “but [my dreams] aren’t in stunning HD” line made me want to throw my computer across the room. Melvin is the epitome of what is wrong with gaming.

    • GrifB

      You do realize he is playing an annoying douchenozzle on purpose, right? It’s supposed to be the stereotypical, repulsive nerd that was a prevalent image a few years back. I mean really, it’s pretty obvious the videos are meant as a joke if you look at his demeanor, how he acts, the subjects of his videos, and how he qualifies his choices. He’s either doing them to make people laugh or to make money.

      Don’t get so mad, man. It’s just a guy playing a goon on youtube.

      • tustin2121

        On purpose or not, I agree with Ed: he’s REALLY f***ing annoying. That lisp was exceptionally difficult to ignore. Now I know not to watch any of his stuff anymore.

      • Ed

        It doesn’t matter if it’s to be funny or not. There’s a difference between satire and perpetuation of a negative stereotype. His actions qualify as the latter. There’s a reason why black-face isn’t acceptable anymore; this shouldn’t be, either.

        • Darchias