The story of Gabe Newell, unlike The Hobbit, deserves to be told over three films. The first two will come out, but unfortunately the third one will never get made…And there will be lots of hats, too.

I’ve watched this video a few times now and I still lose it every time Gabe enters the stage. Greatest entrance EVAR!

Still it’s not like Valve will ever actually release Half-Life 3. Remember, they have a flowchart for that.

I know there’s hats in there somewhere.