Mission Abort

Mission Abort

Mission Abort

by Steve Napierski to Comics

Since Dueling Analogs is a gaming webcomic, under penalty of law I am required to do a Portal related strip since Portal 2 was released this past Tuesday. Also, this is a link to all the previous Portal content that has appeared on Dueling Analogs over the years. Just in case you missed it. In conclusion… Portal, Portal, Portal. Thank you.

Update: Over on Twitter, yusaku777 commented: “… dammit, I can’t decide if the dumpster should be labeled “HUGE MISTAKES” or if that should be the name for the clinic.” [2] Now that’s funny.

Discussion (64)¬

  1. David Herbert
    David Herbert says:
    April 21, 2011 at 1:38 am #

    … Wow that was in poor taste. Amusing, but still…

    • Steve Napierski
      Steve Napierski says:
      April 21, 2011 at 3:03 am #

      See what you started.

      • David Herbert
        David Herbert says:
        April 21, 2011 at 9:50 am #

        I think it would have happened either way.

        • Steve Napierski
          Steve Napierski says:
          April 21, 2011 at 10:01 am #

          Funny part is, I didn’t think it would. I honestly expected the same response my wife gave me when I told her to premise of the comic: Glare at me. Say, “Hmm…” And then change the subject.

        • David Herbert
          David Herbert says:
          April 22, 2011 at 12:21 am #

          No, it’s the internet, people would have commented.

  2. Scott
    Scott says:
    April 21, 2011 at 1:58 am #

    Steve copies VGCats again! (the fetus abuse, not the specific joke…)

    • Randomgamerdude
      Randomgamerdude says:
      April 21, 2011 at 3:07 pm #

      I think most webcomics out there have abused fetuses. Apparently, they are creepy like that.

  3. GoGoCactus
    GoGoCactus says:
    April 21, 2011 at 2:49 am #

    A good and creative joke, but in a way also quite tasteless.

  4. lAce
    lAce says:
    April 21, 2011 at 2:54 am #

    Disgusting and tasteless :S Sorry, your comics are fun usually. This is not.

  5. BullMoose
    BullMoose says:
    April 21, 2011 at 3:17 am #

    :( Wasn’t that in the ASHPD instruction manual? “Do not tough the operational end of the device, Do not look directly into the operational end of the device, Do not submerge the device in liquid, even partially, Do not use the device in controversial medical procedures.” Scratch that. This is EXACTLY the sort of diabolical thing Aperture Science would do with a portal gun.

  6. Q
    Q says:
    April 21, 2011 at 3:21 am #

    <3 it.

  7. MattyMattMatt
    MattyMattMatt says:
    April 21, 2011 at 4:07 am #

    At first I was like, twenty weeks and giving birth? That’s a problem, but then I lol’ed.

  8. sasetsu
    sasetsu says:
    April 21, 2011 at 4:48 am #

    Obligatory portal joke yes? Also I enjoyed this comic for being darker humour

  9. ARite
    ARite says:
    April 21, 2011 at 5:58 am #

    So… If all gaming webcomics are obliged to do a Portal joke, then it’s hard to be original since most of the good/original jokes were done at least once.
    Congratulations, Steve – you have made the most awful Portal joke i have ever seen. Even if i don’t find it funny – i still like your “up to eleven” approach. It’s kind of an achievement if a comic strip falls into “the most [something] of [something]”.
    Also – the whole procedure looks like something the Aperture Science would actually do instead of having to deal with giving someone a maternity leave, which is even more gross when you think about it o.O

  10. mepstein
    mepstein says:
    April 21, 2011 at 7:26 am #

    This made my morning. Way to go! :D

  11. Da Mighty Camel
    Da Mighty Camel says:
    April 21, 2011 at 7:28 am #

    Abortions, fuck yeah!

    Keep up the good work. :D

  12. El Demonio
    El Demonio says:
    April 21, 2011 at 8:33 am #

    “At twenty weeks the fetus should be around 8 inches!
    I do not lixorz this comic!!”

    Are you not entertained?!?

    Listen, I’m not a fan of people who should use condoms but don’t – and I’m acquainted with several.
    Ideally, abortion wouldn’t even be an option.

    But, the fetus coming out of the portal brought a smile to my face.
    I also like how the guy is still hunched over and talking to her vulva.
    Just making sure there aren’t any extra parasites lurking around, mayhaps?

  13. Herbert
    Herbert says:
    April 21, 2011 at 8:56 am #

    I’m normally entertained by your comics but this one just crossed the line for me. Abortions do have to occur because is is a choice but it should never really be joked about like this.

  14. Mr. Horse
    Mr. Horse says:
    April 21, 2011 at 9:29 am #

    Steve, I’ve been following this comic since the beginning and its really disapointing to see you stoop this low. Not even your abortion man was this offensive. How can you as a Father even draw somthing like this?

    • Steve Napierski
      Steve Napierski says:
      April 21, 2011 at 9:41 am #

      Wait, what? Ugh… Guess it’s time to update the post.

    • Steve Napierski
      Steve Napierski says:
      April 21, 2011 at 10:36 am #

      Actually, I decided not to. I’ll let the comment section be the “commentary.”

      I’m not easily offended (the comic archive shows that). And as such, I can see the humor behind things that people merely label as offensive and ignore. If I created only content that aligned perfectly with my personal beliefs and scruples some of my best comics would never have been created. Does that make sense?

      Thinking that someone falling flat on their face is funny, but hoping it doesn’t happen in the first place are not necessarily contradictions.

      • discogranny
        discogranny says:
        April 21, 2011 at 3:39 pm #

        Steve, you don’t have to explain yourself. It’s the internet; there is no line to cross. Everything is fair game, and if those who don’t have a sense of humor can’t take the heat they need to stay away.

        This is just like the Penny Arcade “Dick Wolves” incident…

  15. Warlord
    Warlord says:
    April 21, 2011 at 9:30 am #

    Hehehehe awesome, i like dark humor and this one was original.

  16. Shaows
    Shaows says:
    April 21, 2011 at 9:48 am #

    I can’t remember who said it, but everyone and everything is fair game to make fun of. There is no playing favorites in comedy.

    • Jetstream
      Jetstream says:
      April 23, 2011 at 1:52 pm #

      They probably didn’t ORIGINALLY say it, but South Park made a whole damn episode about it. A two-parter, even.

  17. Triaxx
    Triaxx says:
    April 21, 2011 at 9:50 am #

    Awesome, portal gun abuse+dead baby comedy=WIN!

  18. Jamie Noguchi
    Jamie Noguchi says:
    April 21, 2011 at 9:53 am #

    Steve, you are a brave, brave man! Not even I, king of all things horrifying and terrible, would come up with something this dark. Fucking yes!

    • Steve Napierski
      Steve Napierski says:
      April 21, 2011 at 9:59 am #

      That is the greatest compliment I have gotten in a long time. And I’ve seen the horrifyingly, terrible things that your mind is capable of creating, as well. That’s some twisted stuff.

      • Jamie Noguchi
        Jamie Noguchi says:
        April 21, 2011 at 10:07 am #

        I calls it like I sees it!

  19. Delta
    Delta says:
    April 21, 2011 at 10:14 am #

    Fun Fact: Abortions are performed. Regularly.

    Women wanted the right to choose, and that is totally their right. I lean pro-life, but only because I am tired of people not owning up to their consequences, and as most abortions come from teens too stupid to understand the most basic principles of life, love, and obligation towards society, I fully support social commentary via “Portal-bortions”.

    Deal with it.

    • Delta
      Delta says:
      April 21, 2011 at 11:06 am #

      Also, to spin more humor, at least being Portal-borted is better than abandoned on a doorstep only to end up in a giant testing facility after “Bring Your Daughter To Work Day”…


    • BigLord
      BigLord says:
      April 26, 2011 at 7:49 pm #

      I love you for creating the word “Portal-bortion”

  20. mike
    mike says:
    April 21, 2011 at 10:32 am #

    wow, i guess someone had to say it. just… wow

  21. Jim
    Jim says:
    April 21, 2011 at 10:46 am #

    Am I going to hell for laughing at this?

  22. Adam
    Adam says:
    April 21, 2011 at 10:51 am #

    Nice comic, right in line with the release of Portal 2…and actually shows the inhumanity of an actual abortion..I liked it : )

  23. J. G.
    J. G. says:
    April 21, 2011 at 11:23 am #

    This has got to be the single darkest comic that I have ever seen posted. That said, this is a comic based on the premise of a game. I don’t think that there is any social commentary here at all save for the people who are posting. We all see what we see, and I don’t think that there is any reason to criticize Steve for doing something unique. If anything, the polarizing effect that this comic has had would seem to indicate just how profound it is.

    Great job, Steve. Things like this are the reason that I’ve been coming to your site for years. Keep it up.

    • Anony
      Anony says:
      April 21, 2011 at 1:01 pm #

      The single darkest comic you’ve ever seen? What about VG Cats fetus dance?

      • J. G.
        J. G. says:
        April 21, 2011 at 1:03 pm #

        I don’t read VG Cats. To clarify, I meant the single darkest comic on this website.

  24. AS
    AS says:
    April 21, 2011 at 1:16 pm #

    Awesome! Best comic strip on here evar!

  25. Mordordevil
    Mordordevil says:
    April 21, 2011 at 3:34 pm #

    I liked it. It didn’t offend me. That probably means I’m going to hell. But meh. I’m sure I’m going there for something worse. Something involving puppies. And Crisco.

  26. discogranny
    discogranny says:
    April 21, 2011 at 3:42 pm #


    Really, people?

    That said, HILARIOUS comic. I just need to tear myself away from the new MK to play Portal 2…

  27. Anonymous H
    Anonymous H says:
    April 21, 2011 at 4:17 pm #

    I don’t know what’s funnier: The awesome comic, or the angry breeder comments.

  28. Anonymous
    Anonymous says:
    April 21, 2011 at 8:01 pm #

    Hahaha! Crazy world huh? Well don’t let it get you down. You know…. Portal. Portal Portal. Portal Portal Portal Portal

  29. SecondTomorrow
    SecondTomorrow says:
    April 22, 2011 at 6:32 am #

    While my girlfriend actually had to have an abortion with our first child (complicated medical BS), I was still able to find the humor in this because it’s a JOKE. I personally laughed, hard at this. I wouldn’t show my girlfriend, for obvious reasons, but I showed my friend and he found it equally horrifying and hilarious.

    I find the comic being “inappropriate” is set aside because of the absolute absurdity of it. For someone who’s been through the actual situation in real life, it’s still possible to find this hilarious because it’s executed so well! Good show, Mr. Napierski!

  30. Kyono
    Kyono says:
    April 22, 2011 at 8:11 am #

    Ya know, a scarier idea woulda been jumping into that portal himself. Just sayin, there’s many scarier ideas. Still, clever comic dood.

  31. Rascal
    Rascal says:
    April 22, 2011 at 8:43 am #

    There is no humor “line.” Anyone that works in comedy will tell you that.
    Loved the joke, I did a double-take.

  32. Numb
    Numb says:
    April 22, 2011 at 10:17 am #

    ….you people DO understand that he told a joke about abortion, and did not in fact perform an abortion, right? I mean, even if you’re super pro-life (I in fact am), you can still laugh at an abortion joke. These reactions are insane. Next time, I guess the strip will need a Hollywood-esque disclosure: “No fetuses were harmed in the making of this webcomic.”

    • Scott
      Scott says:
      April 23, 2011 at 12:04 am #

      Given dude, but look at it this way…

      Try talking smack about a certain prophet without actually, you know, digging up his corpse to defile it, and see how his billion followers take it.

      Or don’t bother, Comedy Central already has that one covered.

      Don’t worry Steve, for all the hype there’s only been like, 8 murders of abortion clinic staff from 1973 till now. There was a gap of 9 years between Dr. Tiller and the prior one.

  33. Why Can't I Hold All These Limes
    Why Can't I Hold All These Limes says:
    April 22, 2011 at 12:20 pm #

    Really tasteless, in so many ways. People told me your jokes were usually twice as offensive as Penny Arcade and half as funny, and I didn’t believe them…until now.

  34. Ryu
    Ryu says:
    April 22, 2011 at 4:35 pm #

    “Tasteless? Whatever… if it made any sense and was healthier for the woman than an actual abortion (which is almost definitely not the case), I’d do this. Maybe not right into the dumpster, gotta dispose of medical waste appropriately. Of course, I hate babies, and not in that ‘babies are annoying, damn…’ kind of way. I really hate babies, and before anyone makes a comment about how we all had to start there and without them there would be no people. My response to that is, GOOD, people suck, we need less of them, and by less, I mean none.”

  35. rynon
    rynon says:
    April 22, 2011 at 11:34 pm #

    why is the pregnant woman still pregnant after the abortion?

  36. Scott
    Scott says:
    April 22, 2011 at 11:48 pm #

    I think you’ve also found a way to make babies conceived via surrogate mothers a much more personal experience.

    Scratch that – feminists are going to immediately demand that men be the ones to bear the baby from now on!

    • BigLord
      BigLord says:
      April 26, 2011 at 7:52 pm #

      How… but a… You mean in the… or up the… AAAAAAAH!!!!!

  37. Evey
    Evey says:
    April 23, 2011 at 2:17 am #

    The more I look at this, the more I love it. Well done.

  38. Ayersy
    Ayersy says:
    April 23, 2011 at 10:15 am #

    Nothing wrong with abortions. People are gonna have them as long as people are having unprotected sex. More condoms, less abortions.

    Abortion jokes are fine, as are jokes about religion, and race, just so long as people realise it’s a joke and don’t get all uppity and annoying about it.

    You know what you’re gonna get when you read DA, I don’t know why anybody is shocked.

    Steve, good work, bro. :D

  39. Byere
    Byere says:
    April 23, 2011 at 3:32 pm #

    Hmmm we have berating of a game, tasteless humour, and an all-round dark joke on a topic that is no laughing matter…

    I lol’d so hard :’D

  40. Mygaffer
    Mygaffer says:
    April 24, 2011 at 3:57 am #

    I LOVED this cartoon, don’t listen to the punks whining about “good taste”.

  41. ShabeRaven
    ShabeRaven says:
    April 24, 2011 at 7:33 am #

    I can’t wait until later today when this is posted on Kotaku and opened up to a whole new group for discussion. I have a feeling you’re going to have the most talked about one this week.

  42. K
    K says:
    April 25, 2011 at 1:13 pm #

    it is the “apature science nonincineratable waste recepticle”

  43. Vanya
    Vanya says:
    April 25, 2011 at 2:32 pm #

    I could’ve sworn I came on here to read a comic.

    By god I did. I laughed, like I’m supposed to. It’s a joke on the internet, my god. Hypocrisy is beautiful, you shmucks will laugh at a million dick jokes, even brutal ones, yet he makes an abortion joke, as that, a joke, and you’re insulting him over it? At least he kept it to a joke and didn’t try to use it to introduce drama into a comedy comic (I’m lookin’ at you Buckley).

    Quit crucifying him for pete’s sake. There’ll be another joke out there the next day about it, you’ll all get your knickers in a twist and you’ll forget all about how much of a problem you had over it.

    Plus, let’s face it. There are ways he could’ve gone way farther.

  44. MJ
    MJ says:
    April 26, 2011 at 4:36 pm #

    This is seriously messed up. That’s not even remotely funny.

  45. MizukiSeishou
    MizukiSeishou says:
    April 27, 2011 at 8:01 am #

    Such controversy. Every artist has a time where he or she creates a storm in a jar.

  46. Chi-Town Chief
    Chi-Town Chief says:
    April 27, 2011 at 12:22 pm #

    Haha This comic is full of WIN!

  47. Lacey Long
    Lacey Long says:
    November 24, 2012 at 3:49 pm #

    Halarious. People who get offended that easily shouldn't be allowed on the internet. Still lol'ing.