Everybody Must Get Stoned

Everybody Must Get Stoned

Everybody Must Get Stoned

by Steve Napierski to Comics

In the original English translation for the SNES version, Palom and Porom said, “Stone!”, not “Break!”, not “Petrify!” and definitely not “Concrete!”

This comic might be a major spoiler for people who haven’t played Final Fantasy IV, yet. Or who are not yet at this point in the game. For those people I say, “The game came out seventeen years ago. You forfeited your privilege to not have it spoiled for you after the first decade.”

You know what was cool about Final Fantasy IV? Prince Edward Chris von Muir the crown prince of Damcyan. Do you know why? Because he’s a fucking bard and bards are fucking awesome! Final Fantasy XI has bards. Ultima Online has bards. Everquest has bards. Everyone has bards, except for World of Warcraft, but I guess that’s why no one is playing World of Warcraft. ;) Interplay did not create just one entire game about the bard, but four: The Bard’s Tale, The Bard’s Tale II: The Destiny Knight, The Bard’s Tale III: Thief of Fate, andBard’s Tale Construction Set. They say music soothes the savage beast and the pen is mightier than the sword. Since there are no author classes in RPGs, I guess we just have to settle for the best… Bards!